Many years ago
a woman complained to me
about the make up -
resenting putting it on.
Now, I think I understand.

There is only G-d
then you go and do that thing
that covert flirt thing
and then my thing... distraction
my distraction settles in

Again and again
I forget there's only G-d
think of you and me
I use the word I too much
and think too much about you

I bought the CD
as if it's something I'd buy
just like that, for me
but mainly it was for him
the artist, for twenty bucks

The weight pulls so hard

You almost pray that it goes

Till one day it's gone

And in its absence you find

A deep need for your anchor

Despite myself, still
I'm at home with loneliness
now at 55
Like when I was a child
Alone sometimes makes more sense

It's impossible
but if you were me I'd say
the right things to you
the things no-one says to me
the things I say to you now

In the midst of my
year of mourning for my dad
mom comes back again
from the dead, reminding me
that she passed away today